Right to Bear Arms: The Newtown Connecticut Shooting

Watching the news on any given day can make me a bit sick to my stomach. I guess when I stop to think about it, it's not the news' fault that all they report is the bad shit that's happening in the world. After all, they couldn't report it if it wasn't happening.

But today, when I sat in my family's home with my 2 nephews and daughter, all under 5 years old, and watched the breaking news report of the elementart school shooting in Newtown, Connecticut, the sick to my stomach feeling was elevated to a higher degree.

Decades ago Buffalo Springfield sang, "There's something happening here and what it is ain't exactly clear." There IS something happening and it's time that we stop and take a good look at how we start to solve these problems instead of waiting for the next time it happens.

For those of you not familiar with today's events I'll sum it up quickly. Another madman with an all too easy to get weapon, opened fire onto an elementary school. He was shot dead but as of earlier today, no one knew what set off this series of events, how many were wounded, or how many fatalities there were.

This is the third shooting in the last year (that we've heard of) of someone opening fire in a public area and wounding or killing innocent civilians. And the only thing that I can think to ask is why is this so easily happening? Why are we not doing something about our gun laws that prevent this from happening? In a Chris Rock special he joked about his version of gun control... bullet control. He jokes that each bullet should cost $5000 cause you best believe that then there'd be no innocent bystanders.



I include this NOT because I find this to be a laughing matter but because as ridiculous as he makes it sound, at least it's a plan, some kind of solution.

The right to bear arms is a constitutional right - I get it, people who are using the constitution to keep your shiny guns. I should also add that the constitution has been changed or amended 27 times and at some point said that only white men over the age of 21 were allowed the right to vote. There's a reason it's called "a living document" and that is so that as we grow as a nation, as our climate as a society changes, so does the document. Maybe it's time we rethink this "right to bear arms" thing.

We are not living in a state of anarchy. We are not in a civil war. And if ever that point should come again in our history we could revisit this idea. For now, the only stories I hear about gun control involve someone shooting up a movie theater, a mall, a school, or other public space. I never hear the story of Ben Jones defending his home from an armed assailant with his registered Smith & Wesson. The stories of guns taking lives far outweigh the stories of guns saving lives.

Never has this been as serious as today's events. Again, I will admit to not having the full story, however, I'm confident that I don't need it. There is nothing you can tell me about a 3rd grader that would warrant a spray down of bullets to befall any elementary school. I can't find rationalizations for any other shooting stories either, but there's something about opening fire at an elementary school that brings this string of gun stories to an even more dire place in our nation.

If this reveals anything it's that there's no place that's sacred and no place that's safe. And until we can prove that we can handle the kind of responsibility that comes with the power of a weapon, we shouldn't be allowed to possess one. I can understand why some people might fight for their right to bear arms. I just don't think this right stands up against the price we're paying for it.

Glad Tidings

It's here, it's here!! Like the anticipation of Christmas morning, the day is finally here!

Today... we fly!

I will start by saying that this trip holds a little sadness. As I wrote in another post this week, this morning I had to say Goodbye to Shayna. It would have happened whether or not I was leaving today but nonetheless it was a sad moment... even if she did come into my room at 6:37 am and wake me up. I will also add that leaving Husband for this many days is also sad for me. Since Husband and I met almost 6 years ago at work we have spent almost everyday together. He gets on my nerves at times, (as I'm sure I get on his) but there is no place I'd rather have him than next to me. So until he meets me in New Jersey on December 22, we will be apart for 10 days - by FAR the most amount of time we have ever been away from each other.

But with sadness also comes room for much happiness - GLAD TIDINGS if you will.

With getting home comes the familiar feeling of Christmas seeping into my pores. Today I am wearing jeans and a tank top with socks and Birkenstockesque shoes... and a scarf - an outfit I would almost never wear here. But soon, in a few hours, I'll be wearing these things out of necessity.. and I can hardly wait. Maybe I'll be eating those words when I'm freezing my a*s off, but for now, let me have it.

In less than a day I will have a Starbucks Hazlenut or Raspberry Hot Chocolate in my hands (whichever fits my mood) and Rafa will get a mini one because I'm her mom and I said so.

Speaking of which, in less than a day, Rafa will be reunited with her cousins, Derek and Jake, something I so look forward to, maybe more than, dare I say, Christmas morning?

When Husband finally arrives, all will be complete for my holiday season. We will visit New York City on an adults only staycation and treat ourselves to some alone time. Well, minus Baby Boy Bump. I obviously can't leave him at home with his abuelos. We will take pictures with Santa, which should be interesting this year since Rafa is mobile and aware that she is sitting on a stranger's lap who is dressed in red - even if he does bring her presents... we'll see how that turns out. My dad has already invited me out on one of our movie dates, an outing that has become traditional for us since my mom is not much of a movie buff unless there's crying involved, so I get to go on the date - free of charge! I will get to  visit with loved ones like the Rockmans, the Weissman's, and the Patrocinio's - all family friends that might as well be family and on the flip side visit the mall and window shop (on a budget) and see all of the beautiful Christmas decorations and hear Christmas music playing everywhere I go. Oh, it's the most wonderful time of the year!

I know these things seem ordinary because they used to seem so obvious to me too - although I loved it even then - but when you don't have something that at some point was ordinary, all of a sudden, they seem extraordinary.

I can't wait to land and see the NYC skyline - always extraordinary - but most of all, I can't wait to burst through my front door of the only home I've ever known and see the faces that will always be home for the holidays.

Safe travels.

Leaving on a Jetplane

One sleep...

One sleep left and then I fly home... (and get a Starbucks hot chocolate upon arrival)

One of the really nice things about Husband and I's first abroad destination is the proximity to our for realsies home in New Jersey. Whereas others have 8 hour flights or layovers or time changes and time zones to worry about, we are 3.5 - 4 hours away... barely a journey. That has certainly worked out in our favor considering that we have had a lot of family visits because of Rafaella's birth last year, not to mention baby bump on the way. Flying home a short distance with an infant (first when Rafa was 2 months and again when she was 10 months) also makes flying as relaxing as you're going to get.

Up until now though, I have always flown with Husband. Maybe being pregnant and emotional makes me want to be home or maybe it's because my grandmother is getting older and this summer proved to be a difficult one on her, or maybe just because it's Christmas and I love the smell of cold air through a scarf, I decided that I wanted to get home a little earlier this year. And since Husband doesn't finish school until December 21st, that means I will be traveling alone.

Well.. not exactly alone.

I am a pretty independent person but I have to be honest that since I had Rafa last year, I tend to stick pretty close to home. Home meaning Husband. He keeps me calm(ish) and is the best father. Unlike other dads that seem to be a bit clueless (I've literally heard other moms say that if they go awa they have to leave an Instructions for Dad List.), Husband is in it to win it. He is so in the loop, he might as well be the loop. So having him on my team is so key in this baby raising thing. Losing him, even for 10 days, is a huge loss. 

Needless to say, waiting for him to arrive in a week and a half and not having him on the plane ride is scary. But it is kind of nice knowing he is so essential to my life.

I have a pretty good idea of how I'm going to manage Rafa at the airport and on the plane:

FOOD.

but I can't feed her for 4 straight hours... can I? 

Ok. No. Right. 

I pray for her awesomeness. Sometimes, I swear she knows when we need this from her and she will look like this

And then, as I tend to be a bit of a worrier, I am terrified that she will look like this

or God forbid like this

She's a great baby. 

Sleeps amazingly at night. 

Eats incredibly well. 

Happy and independent. 

...but not a good traveler. 

Unlike many kids who need only a few bumps in a car ride to fall deeply asleep, let's just say Rafa can barely tolerate it. I have actually punched the car door a few times or imagined flinging my body out of the moving car during some of her outrageous, screaming car ride fits. 

Luckily here are the +es I have working for me:

• Planes, unlike cars, allow for some movement and distraction. 
• People seem to be attracted to Rafa's flirty, happy nature and she eats it up so that should help keep her attention. 
• huge bonus - she has her own seat... and it's not a car seat! Since carrying a 6 month baby in my belly and a 14 month old on my lap wasn't the epitome of comfort, Husband and I decided to put out a little money to get Rafaella her own seat. 

My thoughtful sister also sent me this LINK a little while back which I will be studying deep into the night. I'll let you know what works.

Keep your fingers crossed. 

Do you have any tips for flying home with a small child?

Shayna: To the Moon and Back

Play & Read

It hit me yesterday...

When we moved to this country, Husband and I had a lot going on. We had just gotten married, we were dealing with a lot back home, and we were having a baby. To add a bit more to the pot, two weeks after I got here, huge and pregnant and scared and newly married, a time that you need support the most, my grandfather passed away after years of battling old age and my best friend and I, of over a decade, "broke up." That break up in itself is a story for another time. Husband and I often joke that we don't know how Rafa didn't come out needing a therapist with all of the drama we faced.

But I firmly believe that God knows what he's doing. I was having Rafa in less than two months and while I was devastated about the loss of my best friend, I just didn't have the time for it. I had a baby to finish baking.

God brought us Rafaella on October 7th at 9:28pm. She was perfect and healthy and all that we asked for. And when I was ready, God also brought me a new buddy. Shayna.

She was all of the things that I had lost but very different. She had come in so unexpectedly but seamlessly and it is really quite extraordinary how simply our friendship happened. One day we knew each other and the next, I felt I had known her a lifetime.

We laugh at the same things. And we laugh a lot. She is the kindest, most positive, supportive, generous person I have probably ever met and at the time of my becoming a new mother, she was all of the things that I needed in my life; a time out from all things serious, the girls night out or any night out, really, the reminder that I was still young and me and free and that I didn't have to be different just because life had became so different. She did for me what my previous friend couldn't do at the time... she was there.

But the best part was not just that she became a part of my life, but that she became a part of my family's life. Husband. Me. Shayna. You'd be hard pressed to find one and not all three. And most of all, she fell in love with Rafa as deeply as Husband and I did. She loved our daughter as if she was her own, something I never realized would be so important in a friend until I had a daughter. Often she'll come over and take Rafa just to hang out or to give us a break. If Husband and I are running an errand, she'll ask if we want her to watch Rafa. She doesn't just say that she loves Rafa. She acts it.

Carrying Rafa to her surprise baby shower

Our friendship took its next level this summer, when she Skyped me that not only was she getting married to an incredible man but that - SURPRISE - she was pregnant! At the time, I wasn't sure, but by the time we both arrived back in Santo Domingo, I was thrilled to tell her that I, too, was pregnant. A reveal that ended in her SCREAMING at the top of her lungs in excitement and pure happiness. By the way... best reaction ever.

Being pregnant is pretty darn exciting. Your life begins on a journey of change that you could never expect and that you don't see coming until its arrived. But to be pregnant and experience all of that miracle with a friend - a true friend, well, that is just another story entirely. I have been blessed to go through both of my pregnancies with two close friends, an unimaginably precious gift.

Our due dates are 10 days apart. We have gone through the milestones, the questions, the laughter, the emotions of pregnancy together. Husband has had two pregnant wives on our doctor's visits, accompanying both Shayna and I to our Ob-Gyn appointments that we always make together. The three of us were together when we found out that she was having a girl and I was having a boy. We have had too many laughs with Shayna's bad habit of asking me a question, waiting for an answer only to doubt my answer. Then asking me the same question a million times until I start to doubt my answer. The result usually ends in an email to our doctor to make sure that I was right. (Our doctor, who by the way finds this threesome pregnancy to be quite funny.) On a day that I come home feeling extra tired and uncomfortable, I will talk to Shayna only to find out that she had an extra tired and uncomfortable type of day too. We go to the pool with our pregnant bellies, complain about missing a good glass of wine, and look up the Astrological Signs of our March arrivals. Hers a Pisces (March 19) or Aries if she's some days late. Mine an Aries (March 29) or Pisces if he's some days early.

But through all of this I have known (and dreaded) one thing. Her fiancee lives in New Zealand. Her baby will be born in New Zealand. So at some point, she will be leaving to New Zealand. Earlier in the month, she found out that she would have to be leaving earlier than she had planned for. And since I had planned to go home a little earlier for Christmas this year, that gives us even less time than we planned.

Yesterday, Shayna stopped by as she usually does and when she opened the door, Rafa SCREAMED! Screamed with excitement and happiness and pure joy as only a child can. Then again, Rafa always screams when Shayna stops by because as much as Shayna loves Rafa, Rafa loves Shayna equally. To the moon and back. They're soul mates. We sat there and hung out, watching Rafa explore and discover life, watching Rafa love Tia Yaya and vice versa. And then it hit me...

That as sad as I am to lose Shayna, my best friend here, I am sadder for Rafa to lose her. It breaks my heart to even write it. Husband reminds me that this is the hard part of living abroad and GOD is he right. Making friends is hard enough when you're adult, making this kind of friend, and then having to say goodbye is incredibly hard, but making this kind of friend that loves you and your husband and your child and then having to say goodbye? That's damn near impossible.

A week ago, I threw Shayna's baby shower, with the much needed help of some very good friends. During lunch, I was "surprisingly nominated" with the honor of making a speech. I'm a writer. I'm good with words.

I had nothing to say.

I did the best I could to garble out the words that I have thought about saying so many times through tears and too many emotions but I am sure that I didn't get out everything I have ever wanted to say. I don't know if I had a lifetime to say it all that I'd be able to get it all out. How do you thank a person who saved your idea of what it means to have and trust a friend? How do you thank a person who loved you when you needed it most, when you felt stranded by one of the most important people in your life?

You can't.

I can only only hope that at any time in her life, when she needs me or when she needs someone, that I could be there in the way that she was for me.

Shaynie -

Thank you, thank you, thank you for being the friend that you've been to me. It has been a pleasure to Focus Friday with you one year and have a baby with you the next. Most people are lucky to have friends through some phases of life and in our barely two years, we have covered a lot of ground. We have cried together but most importantly we have laughed together. I will keep so close to my heart so many of the moments that we have shared and look forward to a time when we will share more moments... with the rest of our growing families. Like I said our last Sunday breakfast, this is the last time we will have Sunday breakfast together. Tbe next time we'll need a bigger table because Jarred and two little babies will be here also! You will be in so many thoughts even with this amazingly huge ocean between us. Phillip Phillips' Home will never play without thinking of what you not only did for me but for our newborn family. You so easily made this place our home.

You are so strong. A fighter. But a fighter that fights with love instead of fists. All of us who have been privileged to have you in our lives are better for it and the world is a shinier, happier place because of your impact on our lives. The world is lucky to have you and even more blessed that another little you will be blessing this place. You have done it all right. Maybe not in the most ordinary and customary way, maybe not in the way that most people would choose to live their lives, but "not all of us who wander are lost." You know where you're going and although it is not in the same direction as me, right now, I have faith that this has only been our beginning.

...to the rest of our story then, Shayna. 

I love you to the moon and back.

Their first bonding - Rafa was 6 weeks!

Even then, Shayna was magical with
Sparkling Lil Angel Face

Prego together

Our family Christmas Picture

St. Patrick's Day last year

Not many friends will dance on a car roof with you

"Focusing"

I wait for your return, my buddy...

An Unveiling: Christmas Card 2012

So as promised yesterday, today is the revealing of the annual Christmas Card. I look forward to this every year and every year I I look diligently through our photos for a solidly ridiculous picture. In the beginning of December, I begin hounding Husband about choosing a picture for the Christmas card. Every year he ignores me by falling back on his Deaf Ear Syndrome (DES) and I end up doing it myself. In his defense, he comes in like Mariano Rivera to close the game, usually taking my artful masterpiece and making it printer ready.

This year, 3 cards made the finals.

Let's review...  

Christmas Card Finalist #1(CCF #1) - With the cuteness that exudes Rafaella's very being, it was hard to not pick a typical, cutesie baby picture. This kid is so photogenic that when I stood her to the side this morning at the migration office to take her picture for her residence card she kept looking forward to the camera, chin down, eyes on camera, smiling big. She knows her way around the camera. And doesn't everyone love a cute baby Christmas card?

We have a baby. We're lucky if we sleep. We're lucky if we sit.

CCF #2 makes me laugh for a few reasons. First, I am not a napping person but I have learned that as a mom, sometimes I just gotta be. So with hand smashed up against my face, slightly opening my mouth to mosquitoes and dripping drool, I will share that this is not a fake sleeping picture. It's real deal. And the dogs love nothing more than when I finally stop and drop like a sack of papas so that they could snuggle with their mama. The next thing I find quite funny about this picture is that Husband isn't actually napping. With his GO,GO,GO coach attitude, always having to be playing volleyball or having a catch or being active, he decided this morning against his better judgement to go surfing. (No matter that I constantly tell him to listen to his body.) He went out for a wave, started swimming to shore, lifted his body to stand and SPAZZZZZ. His back went out! This is him after seeing the doctor and getting a shot of vitamin B in his arse to help manage the pain. Olive, faithful as always, stays by his side. And then of course, there's just something about a sleeping girl and her space rocket ship raft wearing a Santa hat, in a shades of pink baithing suit, with her bite me thighs that I find totally ridick!

We live on a tropical island. We go to the beach for my birthday. My birthday is in January. It's a nice luxury.

I love CCF #3 because not only does it show our life on this beautiful island, but floating space rocket ship Jersey is the single most ridiculous picture I took all year. We bought that raft for Rafa. She didn't take to it much. Her loss, Jersey's gain. He has since Detroit leaned in that raft on several beaches and the pool of our rented villa at Las Terrenas, DR.

And the winner of the Official Christmas Card of 2012

DRUM ROLL...

Christmas Card Finalist #2 - God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen!

Husband wanted to keep this tradition silly, I don't want to be the parents that send cute pictures of their kids for Christmas. And I agreed. I love getting pictures of other people's kids at Christmas time but this tradition for me was never intended to be serious. It was started to make people laugh... I can't get serious now.

So while CCF #1 is toooooo adorable, in my biased opinion, and will get printed for grandparents and such, it did not get the Official Stamp of 2012.

CCF #3 I still believe to hold the most ridiculous picture of the year - what beats a dog wearing a Santa hat floating on a space rocket ship in the middle of the ocean? Just say that out loud and you'll understand the insanity of it. But besides that absurdity, the rest is a little too normal for me.

CCF #2 gets the official title of Christmas Card 2012. It is the perfect storm: finding pictures of each one of us sleeping at some point this year - not to mention that if you look close enough you could probably see drool dripping down my chin and Husband has yet to go surfing again.

Traditions of Christmas Future

Last night, Husband and I sat in the living room with our Christmas lights twinkling and our tree all lit up. Not many other lights were on in the house, just the bright colorful lights of the season, lit up our place. He on one couch with Olive, I on the other couch, with Jersey - of course - we watched Rafaella romp around the living room entertaining herself: looking at the tree, trying to grab the tree, picking up shoes, trying to lick the shoes (kids are gross that way), pulling the blanket off the ottoman, wrapping herself in the blanket like something out of the Nativity Scene.
It was one of those small moments that you realize is a big moment and moves you in a BIG way.

We started talking about Christmas Future and Mike, in his wise and wonderful soulful way said, "These will be our traditions, huh?" Yeah. I thought. They will be. And I can't wait.

Traditions are what make Christmas; what build memories. 

I have so many memories of my own Christmases that  dreaming of building memories with Rafaella and her soon to be baby brother, as a new family, makes me all - grinch after realizing what Christmas really is - warm inside

I've started compiling my own ideas and ideas from bloggers and Pinterest - my go to for all things Wow! What an amaze idea - that I think would make for fun and warm and memorable and most importantly, togetherly Christmas and holiday traditions; things that make me watery eyed and corny excited. I hope you can get some ideas for your own traditions and share them with me.

Here goes:

#1 - Christmas in NYC
When Husband and I first started dating, for our first Christmas season, we both took the same day off of work and went into New York City, the best city in the world that we are lucky to have close by, to do all things Christmas... as only NYC can do. Little did we know that we were starting a tradition without even knowing it. Every year after that we would take off a day from school and hop on a train to Manhattan to window browse the perfectly adorned NYC windows, visit Macy's, eat soup, drink lots of hot chocolate, of course see the Christmas tree at Rockefeller Center, and end in the peace and solitude of beautiful Saint Patrick's Cathedral. I don't know where we will live in the future but I hope that we could make it back to NYC, my favorite city, every year, for my favorite time of year. And if the kids have to play hooky and be taken out of school for this yearly tradition, I have a feeling they'll love it even more.

#2 - Mini-Van Express
Passed down from one blogger to another, I found this idea on Pinterest. The idea is that as the kids take baths, put on their pajamas and get ready for bed, you prepare your car, however you'd like, for the excursion: make popcorn, hot chocolate, decorate your car (I"ve done this before and LOVE getting into a Christmas car), get your Christmas station or CD ready, get dressed as a train conductor, etc. When the kids get to their room, they find a Mini-Van Express Ticket waiting for them which they will use to "board" the Mini-Van. When they get to the car in their PJs, the conductor, hole punches their ticket and off you go. From here, you could take this a few different ways. You might do the same thing every year or maybe you change it up every year but here are some ideas on where to take your Mini-Van Express:

• Drive around your neighborhood or other neighborhoods googling and awing at the decorations. My family used to do this and I LOVED it!
• Look in your area for other places that are decorated. In NJ, off Exit 116 (what? everything in NJ has an "exit") the PNC Arts Center which normally holds concerts used to decorate their huge parking lot in a Christmas Lights Spectacular. You drove through the parking lot in your car through a magical world of Christmas lights and festivity. I've also heard good things about the Turtle Back Zoo in Essex, NJ. But there's tons to find.
• Find a local outdoor skating rink and take the kiddies ice-skating in your pajamas (how cute would that be?)

Click the picture for free ticket printable
courtesy of another great blog!

#3 - 25 Books of Christmas
Being an English teacher and married to an elementary school teacher who had his own collection of children's books before I was ever in the picture, this one is a great idea for us! For each day in December, wrap a Christmas book and leave it under the tree. Then every night, the kids unwrap one book and we sit around the tree and read it together. Christmas Eve; however, would always end with the traditional "Twas the Night Before Christmas." I also might throw in a little variation to the 25 Books of Christmas by adding to an already established tradition. For the last year, Husband and I have had a weekly tradition Friday nights after putting the babes to sleep at 7:00 pm of ordering pizza and putting on a movie. It's movie date night that we took a step further by splurging on a projector and watching our movies on the "big screen" in our living room. So each Friday in December, instead of a book, we unwrap a Christmas movie and watch it on the big screen:

Cute way to showcase the Christmas books. In this blog they also numbered
the books in the order of which day to unwrap which book - just another idea.

Some Christmas Movie Ideas:

• Miracle on 34th Street (old and new version)
• Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
• Scrooged (noooooo PEEKING! - haha - great movie, totally underrated)
• The Grinch (definitely cartoon version)
• The Family Man
• Elf
• It's a Wonderful Life
• Love Actually (when they're older)
• The Polar Express
• Home Alone
• Prep & Landing (I caught this Disney Christmas movie on TV a few years ago... solid)
• National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

What books or  movies would you put on your list?

#4 - Christmas Night

love this present tag!

This great idea was originally for Christmas Eve. The box included new pajamas, popcorn, hot chocolate, and a movie to watch on Christmas Eve before getting ready for Santa's arrival but as any good Cuban knows, Noche Buena is celebrated with a lot of food, drink, and noise so being peaceful an watching a movie just wouldn't work on December 24. Instead, I am opting to do this on Christmas Night. I love Christmas night. It might be my favorite night of the year. There is something so peaceful and heartwarming about sitting around after the hustle and bustle of the season is behind you, but still with you. After buying and wrapping and ribboning, and trips to crowded malls and making your visits, and opening all of the presents, Christmas night brings about that peacefulness allowing you to sit in front of the tree or TV and eat leftovers and reflect on the beauty that is December 25th. How special would it be at this moment to have one last "family" present that no one is expecting?

You could wrap individual presents for each person or (as this picture shows) wrap one big box, layered with gifts for each family member. Your box can include whatever you'd like but I like the idea of making it a family event.

Ideas for Christmas Box:

• New pajamas
• Christmas Movie or Christmas Book(s)
• Hot Chocolate
• Caramel Popcorn
• Cookie Dough to bake cookies
• Candy
• Blanket, slippers, or something cozy for movie watching
• One last trinket specific to each person

Do you have any other ideas for the Christmas Box?

#5 - Balloon Countdown

Rafa's festive head was inserted over original child that is not mine.
(Picture found on Pinterest)

This would be incredible for New Year's, but I think it would work well for any countdown: Christmas, New Year's, birthday, anniversaries - the possibilities are endless! The picture is pretty self-explanatory but you would have ballons for every hour that you are counting down. This countdown would work seemlessly with our loud Cuban Noche Buenas. You don't need anything inside the balloons since popping a balloon every hour would build its own anticipation and be a treat in itself, but if you choose to, you could put a slip of paper in each balloon with an activity to do or a memory from the year or a little present or money.

#6 - Christmas Fun List
I love Thanksgiving because, for me, it signals the beginning of the holiday season. The promise of decorating and Christmas music coupled with the steadiness of tradition and the hope of magic - its almost too much, my head could explode! Creating a Fun Christmas Ho Ho Ho To Do List would be a great idea to blend tradition and magic and push you to do all of those things you want to do and never make time for:

Ideas for Fun Christmas Ho Ho Ho To Do List

• bake Christmas cookies 
• traditional sleigh ride through snow
• Christmas Carol prank call relatives (except without less pranking and more talking) 
• get dressed up and have a Christmas music dance party
• write letters to Santa
• choose a way to help someone in need
• Candlelight dinner on the longest night of the year - December 21.  (♥ this one)
• get a Christmas tree and decorate it
• make Christmas cards and send them

#7 - Neighborhood Christmas Caroling

Last year, my favorite event of the year in our new country was Colmado Caroling. We met at our building, where a bunch of us live, walked to our corner colmado (basically, the corner store where you could buy everything from specific pounds of sugar to the equivalent of a 40oz., called a Jumbo, of the national beer, Presidente.) and started here. There was no practice or tuning, although we did have the band teacher and his handy trumpet - always helpful - with us. Our Caroling leader printed out 10-15 Christmas carols that we shared and an amazing evening was born. We walked around the neighborhood caroling our faces off. We sang to about 6 colmados, 1 restaurant, 1 combination gas station/colmado, 2 hair salons, 1 bakery, 1 apartment building, and ended in a supermarket. All it took was willingness to look silly and printed out lyrics (and the Jumbos didn't hurt). The rest was made in cheer and holiday spirit. This could easily be tailored to a small neighborhood. Get your kids' friends and their families involved, post signs with the date and time and have people expecting you or inviting them out too, and then end your evening of Caroling at home with some hot cocoa and Four Sisters Holiday Seasoned Wine (aka "Christmas Wine" to my sister and I) - it tastes exactly like what Christmas should taste like.

 

 

# 8 - Very Personalized Christmas Cards

This is a tradition I started about 9 years ago when I was a single mingle lady. I loved Christmas so much and loved the idea of sending Photo Christmas cards but didn't want to wait til I had a husband, or kids, or a family to do it so I decided that I would send my own single cards and have waaaay tooo much  FUN with it! I looked through all of my pictures from the year and found the funniest picture I could find and printed out about 30 copies. Next, I cut out 60 red traingles (one for me and one for Puff, the dragon), hole punched 60 white dots and cut out 60 white clouds. I pasted these together to make a Santa hat and then pasted the Santa hat on the picture. As the years passed and my list expanded I opted for less labor intensive cards and I made Santa hats on the computer. The only restriction I have placed on myself is that the picture must be silly and somewhat ridiculous and from that year. I've had friends and their families tell me they look forward to my Christmas card every year. This tradition I will keep alive. And I think you'll notice, not much has changed throughout the years.

Cards of Christmas Past

The original Single Mingle Christmas Card 2004

Christmas 2005

Vegas, baby 2006

Christmas 2007 - 80's party 

Christmas 2008 - with Mr. Washington who
crossed the Delaware on Dec. 25

Christmas 2009 - the year we adopted our first baby, Jersey

Christmas 2011 - If you look closely, you'll see a knocked out 

mama, baby, Jersey, and Olive all snuggly buggly.

Stay tuned for this year's Christmas Card choices in tomorrow's post... 

I'm sure as the years come and go that other traditions will stick and some of these will not but the important part is that traditions are made. 

What are some holiday traditions that you have or hope to start?

My Journey to the Boyside...begins

Before I had a baby and thought about having babies I imagined myself having a little girl. My brain is so hard-wired with pictures of my own childhood with my sister that having a girl was just what was going to happen. And I reaallllly wanted a girl. So when I was pregnant the first time and the doctor sputtered those magical words - Its a girl - I was over the moon.

I am not lacking in confidence - or much modesty - so having a mini-me walking around was thrilling. I couldn't wait - like all mothers of girls - to dress her up: big bows, puffy skirts, tutus galore, shiny dresses, fancy shoes that sparkle.

About six weeks ago, we were at our OB-GYN's office for our monthly appointment. She has an ultrasound machine but has repeated to us that the quality is not as high resolution as at the specialist's office. She really couldn't see any "parts" - girl or boy - and I was still not even 18 weeks but if she had to guess, she said, she would guess a girl.

Another girl.

I was excited but I had mixed feelings. I love little girls. But a part of me wanted a boy too. True to form, I was indecisive. If I was shopping, I'd handle this scenario by just getting both, but alas, this isn't a trip to the mall. Darn! Too bad we weren't having twins like Husband had hoped for: 1 boy and 1 girl. Problem solved.

We started talking about girl names again. The ones that almost won out to Rafaella the first time around: Cecilia, Valentina, Benicia (because I love the nickname Benny for a girl... so cute). We walked into the ultrasound appointment so excited to find out again what our second child would be, expecting the expected, another heavenly girl. So when the doctor said we were having a boy, I almost sat straight up and pushed him Elaine Benes "Get Out" (Seinfeld) style.

I was excited but I had mixed feelings. Indecisive, remember? I wanted a little boy. But a part of me wanted another girl too. I started getting sad at Rafa growing up and me no longer having a baby girl that I could dress in cutesy, girly whirly outfits. Darn! Too bad we weren't having twins like Husband had hoped for: 1 boy and 1 girl. Problem solved. Then I realized...

I'm pregnant and emotional. Get a hold of yourself, Legra.

It took a few days for both Husband and I to fully comprehend that we were having a boy. A boy... really? A boy.

A boy?! What do I even do with a boy? This was the first time I realized that I guess I had really never imagined myself having one of those. I'm so girly; throw girly tantrums and girly fits and like girly clothes and girly roll my eyes and girly swish my dramatic neck, that a boy never crossed my mind.

And then, my least favorite part of Boyside settled in. Yes. I'm talking about the clothes.

I've never been a fan of boy clothes. And I'm not just talking about baby boy clothes, I'm talking all boy clothes. Whenever I go shopping with Husband, I always find myself in the girl section like a person who sleepwalks and wakes up in the kitchen eating brownies and not sure how they got there. Inevitably, Husband yells at me. Why is it that you always wander off when we're shopping for me? I help you shop, don't I? He's right. He does. And he knows my taste so well that I find it difficult to shop without his opinion.

But honestly, Husband, how many khaki pants, striped polos, and brown belts can one look at? For me,  boy clothes don't look that different or have that much personality.

So how do I go from girl clothes - which have soooo much personality - to buying boy clothes?

(Additionally, anything that I find to be pretty cute is fit for fall or winter weather: long sleeves, long pants, hoodies, jackets, sweaters - nothing that someone living on this island could wear without fainting from heat stroke.)

So now, instead of complaining - which I fear I will still continue to do to Husband - sorry Husband - I have started my journey to the Boyside. I am looking daily through Pinterest for boy things with personality, checking out every store and steal and deal that I can for boy outfits that don't say anything about being an athlete or an All Star. Why should girls get all the cute stuff anyway?

Rafaella has a headband bow collection. Baby Boy will have a bow tie collection. Rafaella has pink converse sneakers, Baby Boy will have some fly ass Vans like daddy. Rafaella has tutus. Baby Boy will have... ummmm, don't know how to battle the adorable tutu - I'll get back to you on that one, but something just as dope!

The search is on...

Here's some fun things I've found so far:

Or most anything by her on Etsy - HaddonCo

Vans like Dad

Any recommendations from Boy MommyLand of stores to check out?