Procrastinating the Good Stuff

Why is it that it is easier for us to get to the chores, the responsibilities, the daily grind? Why is it so easy to check off the everyday to-do list than it is to check off the feeling good to-do list?

At our last baby doctor's appointment, our doctor informed us that Little B is breeched which would explain the stomping on my pelvic floor and the fist in my ribs. According to her suggestion, swimming   would help him to move into ready to go position (since it elongates my body and gives Little B more room) and would also be good exercise for me. Because of her advice and (mostly) the fear of having to move Little B into positioning by unnatural ways that could break my water in the process and cause labor 3 weeks early, I decided to start swimming.

Everyday since I've been "suiting up" and heading to Fiesta, the pool where we're members.

It's not a bad way to start the day.

Okay. Okay.

So it's an amazing way to start the day.

But here's my question today? 

Why did it take doctor's orders for me to start this?

 I am in a place both by location and fortune that I could enjoy free time, warm weather, and a pool membership. It seems like an easy equation? Doesn't it? I've even had husbandal support. Meeks has been telling me for months to take it easy. To go to Fiesta and get some back relief and, while I'm at it, down time. Why haven't I listened? I have enough time during the day.

ROUTINE:

• Wake up with Rafa
• Feed Rafa
• Make breakfast with Rafa
• Eat breakfast with Rafa
• Get dressed with Rafa
• Pack up
• Head out to coffeeshop for writing (cross fingers I'm there by 10:00 am)
• Head over to school for lunch with Husband (by 11:00 am)
• Finish lunch (by 12:00 pm)
• Work on writing OR work at school (12:00 - 3:30)
• Go home and climb the four flights of stairs that are right now my enemy (by 4:00)
• Spend time with Rafa and Meeks (until 6:00pm)
• Start Nightly Routine (see Nightly Routine)

NIGHTLY ROUTINE:

• Put Rafa in high chair for Baby Einstein 
• Get rid of proof that a baby runs the house by cleaning up toys and setting house for adult time while Meeks makes Rafa's bottles.
• Give Rafa bath - well I sit and watch as Meeks bathes her. I'm not much help these days with this big ol' Little B filled belly.
• Take shower as Meeks puts Rafa to sleep (by 7:00)
• Drop dead. At this point my feet, back, and pelvic bone are DONE.
• Eat dinner (anytime before 8:30 is hopeful).
• Talk to Meeks. Finally we have a moment alone.

Okay, so the thing about this "having time" thing is that, I don't. I'm so invested in my routine, my daily grind, that it's hard to make time for anything else. It's so much easier to say YES to my routine than it is to say YES to sitting in or by a pool and enjoying a little bit of R&R and much needed back relief. 

Even my first few days at the pool were hard. 

I gave myself a time limit:

Okay. I'm here for an hour and then I'll get dressed, put on my makeup, drive to school, rush to meet Meeks for lunch.  - Any ideas how hard it is to move fast right now?

I brought my laptop 

Maybe I could work on something for work here or do some writing or editing.

But eventually, I allowed myself to

It took some mental manipulation but I allowed myself to stop and take advantage of the opportunity in front of me. One day, one of the staff members said to me that this baby is going to be a helluva swimmer. And as I was swimming, an amazing thought doggy paddled into my mind. What if I looked at this as something not selfish for me but needed for us? 

I am close to 35 weeks pregos with Little B and carrying him has been getting increasingly more difficult than it was with his sister, Rafaella. The last month of my pregnancy with Rafa I spent salsa dancing at more than one party. Right now, I am using both hands to help cross my legs. But maybe that's because in the last month with Rafa I wasn't doing what I'm doing now. I wasn't carrying around and taking care of another baby, a 16 month old baby. She had my our full attention. Little B hasn't had that as much - second child syndrome and all. Maybe that's why he's nudging all of the time. 

Hey, Ma! Remember I'm in here too!

When I changed my outlook, I changed how I viewed my alone time. Truth is, it's not alone time. It's time with Little B. We listen to music through my headphones, we breathe, we swim. I rub my belly and he kicks me in the gut.  

And that, I can gladly put into my daily grind.

Photos from Dominican Fiesta Hotel & Casino website

Why do you think it's easier to put off the good stuff?